Three

Whenever I hear someone say, “She has 3 kids”, I look to see who that person is talking about. Even after a year, it seems weird to me that I have 3 children. We should be at the point now where things should be running smoothly, right? It’s been a year, Juliana is 4-1/2, all of the children sleep well on most nights and we are two relatively smart and capable people; we should be able to manage daily life.


I had been dreading April, it started with a long drive with the kids and the first night away from home for the boys. No one slept well that first night and then we drove home during the next night. I slept for 3 hours before the boys woke-up and then I was very sick the entire day. Monday I didn’t feel much better; by mid-afternoon I managed to eat some crackers but nothing else. At some point I started my presentations for my week of meetings and packed a suitcase.

Tuesday morning I was up early and went to the airport to fly to Chicago. I made it to my meeting and survived several days of meetings that started early in the morning and went through late dinners. I came home Friday afternoon and that weekend Scott had National Guard so I had solo parenting responsibilities. Did I forget to mention that my parents were out of town as well during this week and weekend?

That next Tuesday was Ruslan and Wyatt’s 1st birthday. Although we didn’t have a party that day – there were still some presents and pictures and other activities to make their birthday special. I spent every evening that week finalizing the plans for the party. I made quick shopping runs during my lunch time each day.

Thursday was the day we found out about my Grandmother’s accident and we had so little information about what was happening and we feared the worst. Friday I took the day off to clean the whole downstairs of the house for company and shop for the final food items. I rearranged furniture and made assignments for party day – cake pick-up, balloons, etc.

Party day was me running around to make food and decorate and keep the boys happy. Getting everyone ready for the party and then keeping the party moving along. When the house was put back together that night I felt so much relief that it was over. I had survived the several weeks of extraordinary activities.  [I just realized I haven't posted anything about their birthday party and it's been almost a month at this point - and the cake smashing was amazing.]

The next week involved visiting potential assisted living facilities for my Grandmother which affected me more strongly than I expected. I was also getting ready for a launch a project at work that I was managing and that certainly added to the stress.

I don’t understand how it got to be halfway through May. This is supposed to be my favorite month of the year – spring and my birthday and Mother’s day and all sorts of good stuff like strawberries. And I am missing it. I am going through the routine each day from one task to the next. Trying my best to keep up with meals and laundry and work and there is no time for me. It’s at times like this that I usually check my camera and find weeks without any pictures – I know from experience that when I hit a low point I stop taking pictures. At least Project 365 guarantees that I have pictures and I can look at them and remind myself why I try so hard and put so much energy into my children. I know that there will come a day when I don’t have all three of them fighting to sit on my lap and I will have a house filled with teenagers who are busy with their own lives (let’s not think too much about that).

I love my three so much and I know how blessed I am to have them.